April 10, 2017


Matt 6:12,14-15; Matt 5;33-48


There is no body alive today, that has not being hurt/wronged in some way. In fact, we cannot boast of staying one month without being hurt or wronged by someone. This means that as long as we live, hurt/wrong doing is part of our life. The most surprising thing is that we are hurt more by those who claim to love us or those we claim to love. In short a major ingredient in human relationships is hurt. Since we are creatures that thrive on relationships, we cannot stay on our own so as to stay away from hurt if we do we will end up hurting ourselves. This means that whether we interact with people or not we will still get hurt. Since most of the hurt/wrong doing we experience come from those we love or trust, and those who claim to love us, it is therefore very difficult to forgive them. In fact, our first reaction is to hurt them back. "Do me I do u God no go vex" Matt 5:38

  • Why do people Hurt us? Is is that we carry a sign on our head on a particular day which says please hurt me or I will die? What makes someone who claims to love us hurt us?
  • Is there anyone who just derives pleasure in hurting others? If yes why?
  • If we know that it is normal for people to hurt us why do we get hurt?
  • They say revenge is sweet, how true is that?
  • Since we know that people will not hurt us intentionally why is it difficult to forgive?

Recap of previous discussion 

  • Hurt is part of human existence i.e., we cannot escape being hurt
  • Even when we we isolate ourselves from others we end up hurting ourselves.
  • People that we love and love us are those that hurt us the most.
  • We get hurt because our expectations from others are not met.
  • It is only our expectation from God that does not fail
  • We get hurt because people have failed us
  • People who hurt us most times do not do it intentionally
  • There people who derive pleasure in hurting others because they are hurting
  • Those that hurt others on purpose are just being used by the Devil
  • Forgiveness is an act of love.

DEALING WITH HURT AND UN-FORGIVENESS - Part 2 (Hosea 1:2-3; 2:2-3, 14-16)


  • - Since we know all these this, why is it difficult to forgive?
  • - We said earlier that forgiveness is an act of love and we are supposed to love ourselves, then why do people find it hard to forgive themselves
  • - What are signs of unforgiveness? Hatred, Malice, Revenge, Bitterness, Impatience, Hurting others, e.t.c

How can we learn to forgive?

A. We need to ask the Holy Spirit to fill us up. Acts 6:5&7:55, 60

B. Make excuses for others mistakes that might have hurt you. Acts 6:60

C. Always call the attention of the person that hurt you to his mistake in love and make peace immediately Matt5:23-24
D.  As much as it depends on you, be at peace with all men. Matt 5:9
E. Show love to those that hurt you. Matt 5:44-45
E. Remember that we also are products of God's forgiveness and we will not be forgiven if we do not forgive others. Matt 6:12&14-15

Some Quotes to remember:

We can only be free from hurt when we forgive those that hurt us. We will not forget but we will be able to move on with or lives. With time we will not feel the pain of the hurt anymore even when we remember.

- "Someone once said that unforgiveness was like a poison you drink while hoping for someone else to die". --Jennifer Heng

- "To violate the law of love is to live in unforgiveness".--Sunday Adelaja

- "Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much". --Oscar Wilde

- "To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you".--C.S LEWIS

- “Keep in mind, hurting people often hurt other people as a result of their own pain. If somebody is rude and inconsiderate, you can almost be certain that they have some unresolved issues inside. They have some major problems, anger, resentment, or some heartache they are trying to cope with or overcome. The last thing they need is for you to make matters worse by responding angrily.” ― Joel Osteen, (Your Best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential)

- “As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison.” ― Nelson Mandela

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